10@10: More ways that Phil Brown could save money for cash-strapped Hull City

By Mirror Football in Football Banter

Published 10:07 03/11/09

• 

Welcome to our new daily topical comedy list, 10@10...

Today: Phil Brown has been told to slash his Hull squad by new chairman Adam Pearson as the club are some £27million in debt .

Unfortunately once they've moved on fringe stars like Peter Halmosi, George Boateng, Daniel Cousin, Tony Warner and Bernard Mendy, Hull will still need to find another, er, £27million or so, so how else could Phil Brown raise the cash?

1) Replace hi-tech wireless microphone system used to communicate on match-days with carrier pigeons.

2) Charge local businesses to be the venue for his half-time team talk

3) Offer self up to Tango for sponsorship

4) Set up a premium-rate phone line for suicidal football fans (would be very popular in Hull)

5) Record a full version of his This Is The Best Trip I've Ever Been On chant from last season ... and then invite people to pay for it never to be played in public

6) Dig out the receipt for Jimmy Bullard, take him down to Harrods and demand Mohamed Al-Fayed gives  a refund on the grounds that the goods were damaged beyond repair when he bought them.

7) Get local legend Dean Windass back in and then hire him out as a bouncy castle for kids' parties

8) Slip an 'F' into the name of Hull's stadium and start knocking out bargain buckets of chicken in between match days.

9) Replace the Tigers' under-performing squad with actual tigers and set-up a circus instead

10) Lump next month's pay-roll on him being out of a job by Christmas

Any more for any more? Sign in below and let us know...

Fancy winning £3,000 for FREE this month? Play Mirror Football Streak for your chance to win cash prizes! Start predicting now!