10@10: Rab C Nesbitt, Jimmy Krankie and the 10 Scots who would do a better job than George Burley

Published 10:22 16/11/09

After Scotland's dismal showing in the 3-0 friendly defeat to Wales George Burley is a dead man walking as boss of the Tartan Army.

And after just three wins in his 14 games in charge, it's hardly surprising the writing is on the wall for the former Ipswich Town manager.

Here are 10 Scots we think could do a better job managing the team than Burley:

1) Rab C Nesbitt
Scotland's unofficial national ambassador would surely be a popular choice with the supporters, and after his performance in this job, Burley could replace Rab, in his wife Mary's words, as "not an unemployed person but the original unemployed person."

2) Braveheart
Started promisingly, then had his guts ripped out at the end - the typical Scottish qualifying experience. "They make take our lives, but they'll never take our free kicks!"

3) Gregory's Girl
As player-manager. A better footballer than anyone currently playing for Scotland.

4) Alan Brazil
Might not bring champagne football back to Scotland, but at least he'd bring the champagne. Might struggle with the early kick-offs.

5) Rod Stewart
Could sing the team talks: "Wake up Malky, I think I've got something to say to you", "We are failing, we are failing" etc. Insistence on team wearing leopardskin-print lycra shorts could be sticking point.

6) Spud from Trainspotting
Questions marks over his tactical nous but would definitely ace the interview.

7) Billy Connolly
His team talks might make marginally more sense than Burley's ramblings.

8) Sean Connery
Football qualifications include turning down Matt Busby's offer to play for Manchester United in his youth. Can already hear him questioning refereeing decisions: "Shurley shome mishtake..."

9) Wee Jimmy Krankie
Current boss is someone doing a poor impression of a football manager so might as well have someone doing a poor impression of a school boy. Post match interviews would obviously consist entirely of exultant cries of "Fandabidozi!"

10) Lorraine Kelly
The first lady of Scottish daytime TV would be the ideal person to give the Scotland squad a makeover and we can't think of anyone better to cheer the players up after yet another dismal defeat to the Faroe Islands.

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