3PM Extra: The best things we've found on the internet today - March 18, 2010

By Ian Cruise in Football Banter

Published 14:41 18/03/10

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OK, so you've done your wages betting on three-legged nags down in the west country and, consequently, are facing a weekend sniffing turps rather than out on the lash. But things ain't all that bad. We're still here every afternoon to cheer you up...

1) MirrorFootball's current favourite thing out there in internet land (apart from MirrorFootball , of course!) is the official website of one Andrey Arshavin. The slightly stern looking Russian Gunner is, in fact, quite clearly bonkers in the nut.

Don't believe us? Then judge for yourself with this random selection of his latest responses in his regular Q&A forum...

Q: Hi, what do you think about piercing?
Andrey: I disapprove of it.

Q: Hello Andrey! I would like to know whether you like cactuses (sic)...
Andrey: They are prickly. I remember we had them in kindergarten. We also had some at home. I didn't like them then and I don't like them now.

Q: Hello, our AA! Do you believe in extraterrestrial civilizations?
Andrey: Truly speaking I do not believe in extraterrestrial civilizations. I believe we live on this planet alone, although my wife says the opposite. I do not like science fiction, fantasy books or movies. I'm indifferent to these things.

Q: Andrey, do you need apples? We've harvested a lot this year! My friends also have a lot of apples and they don't take mine. But they are so tasty and sweet, especially "white juice". It is a pity that they'll go bad...
Andrey: I love apples, but on the other hand, I think there are many other deserving people who will accept your apples.

The man's a genius...!

2) Jose Mourinho might have kept his public celebrations down to the bare minimum the other night when his Inter Milan team dumped Chelsea out of the Champions League, but there were no such restraints from this fella on Italian TV. Frankly, we'd like to see a bit more of this sort of action on Soccer Saturday...

3) Girls playing football we can generally take or leave. Girls fighting at football, on the other hand, we're huge fans of. And nowhere is the art better demonstrated than in the good old US of A. Never mind the ball, just keep your eyes on the goalie and the opposition attacker...

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