If you want to get ahead get a brochure: 10 things we've learned from the summer transfer window

By Dan Silver in Football Banter

Published 18:47 01/09/09

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So, that's that over with, then - well, at least until January, anyway, when the who farrago starts up again.

But what have we learned from this transfer window?

1) If you want to land that dream move to Old Trafford, it's well worth taking a course in desk top publishing first. Nothing says 'buy me' like a hastily-produced brochure hawking your wares in the manner of a Damart underwear catalogue. Eh, Michael Owen?

2) You can never have too many strikers. Forget a 'Carling Cup side', Mark Hughes bought so many forwards in the past three months that Manchester City would need the re-introduction of the Anglo-Italian Cup in order to play them all.

3) We all knew Harry Redknapp has a penchant for signing players he's previously worked with at former clubs. But following the acquisitions of Peter Crouch and Niko Kranjcar - not to mention the near mises with David James and Anton Ferdinand - we're fully expecting Spurs to put in a bid for Everald La Ronde at Christmas (look him up).

4) Thank goodness Rafa Benitez won his battle to take direct control of Liverpool's transfer policy. Otherwise some blithering idiot on the board might have sold his star holding midfielder and replaced him with an over-priced full back, a crocked Italian and an ageing Greek centre-back who could barely hack it at Rangers. Oh, hang on...

5) A year really is a long time in football. Twelve months ago David Bentley was revealing how joining Tottenham was the culmination of a life-long dream. This week, the only thing stopping Spurs fans driving him up to Manchester City for his medical themselves was the hope that Bentley might drive himself.

6) You can't blame Sulhamain Al Fayim for failing to attract any decent players this summer. After all, if there's one city where they know about the dangers of joining sinking ships, it's Portsmouth.

7) You also can't blame Arsene Wenger for not rushing out to spend the £30million profit - give or take - that Arsenal made this transfer window hasn't gone to waste. After all, there's going to be a hell of a lot of fines for diving to pay this season...

8) Jose Mourinho really is the Special One. Persuading Barca to stump up 40million AND Samuel Eto'o in exchange for Zlatan Ibrahimovich wasn't just the summer's best bit of business, it was also its biggest robbery. Frankly, that £40million jewel heist in London looked like a high-street mugging in comparison.

9) If you want to change club on deadline day then change your name to Collins. No less than three moved today - James from West Ham to Aston Villa, Danny from Sunderland to Stoke, and Dominic from Preston to Crawley. Collins John did move this window, but sadly it was back in July.

10) Joleon Lescott is worth £24million. And no, there isn't a decimal point missing from that number. Roll on January...

What's tickled you this transfer window? Let us know by leaving a comment below...

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