New chants for the new season

Published 16:32 29/07/11

The 2011/12 season is almost upon us and we'll need some new chants. Here are some suggestions from our @mirrorfootball Twitter Army - send us yours!

For fans playing Chelsea, to the tune of Lord Of The Dance: "Torres, wherever you may be/You're not as good as the Little Pea/The goal is that big thing you see/Being pointed at by AVB"

For fans playing Chelsea, also to the tune of Lord Of The Dance: "Chelsea/Your boss is 33/Most of the squad is older than he/It could be worse, instead of AVB/Roman could have brought back Avram G" (thanks to @jameswy2010)

For fans playing Chelsea, to the tune of Volare: "Fernando/woah-oh/Fernando/woah-oh-oh-oh/You're destined for the bench/You look like Louise Mensch"

For Arsenal fans, to the tune of Volare: "Gervinho/woah-oh/Gervinho/woah-oh-oh-oh/The trophy cupboard's bare/But you've got lovely hair"

For Arsenal fans, also to the tune of Volare: "Gervinho/woah-oh/Gervinho/woah-oh-oh-oh/ they need you in defence/your forehead is immense" (thanks to @Pandaman_cometh)

For QPR fans, to the tune of Tom Hark: "Kieron Dyer/You'll shortly retire/Kieron Dyer/You'll shortly retire"

For QPR fans, also to the tune of Tom Hark: "He doesn't drink/He doesn't pass/He'll leave John Terry on his arse/Taarabt, Taarabt/Taarabt, Taarabt/Taarabt, Taarabt/Taarabt, Taarabt"

For fans playing Liverpool, to the tune of Go West: "Jor-dan/Jor-dan Hen-der-son/You were/Too expensive, son"

For Manchester United fans: "Phil Jones/There's only one Phil Jones/But it's a common name/And so there must be loads"

For fans playing Manchester United, to the tune of Love Will Tear Us Apart: "Giggs, Giggs will cheat on his wife/Again"

For Sunderland fans, to the tune of The Addams Family: "His name is Connor Wickham/His old boss loved to kick 'em/And now he is a Mackem/Which very nearly rhymes"

For Liverpool fans, to the tune of Tom Hark: "Stewart Downing/You're holding a scarf/Stewart Downing/You're holding a scarf"

For Tottenham fans, to the tune of Volare: "Gattuso/woah-oh/Gattuso/woah-oh-oh-oh/Stop looking for a fight/You're absolutely shite" (thanks to @leezheyi)

For fans playing Tottenham, to the tune of Suzanne Vega's Luka: "My name is Luka/I live on the second floor/I told the Spurs 'f**k you/I want to play for Chelsea more'"

Any more? Get involved by sending your new season chants to mirrorfootballstaff@mirror.co.uk

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