Rio Ferdinand's lookalike and Franck Ribery ribaldry - the five best things we've found on the web today

By Mirror Football in Football Banter

Published 14:55 11/11/09

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It's 3pm! It's downhill all the way from here to knocking off time so we've gathered the five best things we've found on the tinterweb today to help the time fly.

1) There are many nicknames we could come up with for Rio Ferdinand, but this is a family website so we'll refrain and leave it to his teammates who are apparently calling him 'Troy' because of his resemblance to a character in ITV's comedy Benidorm. We're not convinced they'd pass for brothers but judge for yourself.

2) Bonnet de douche Rodney, mange tout. Given our grasp of foreign languages is about as advanced as Del Boy's, it's a good job The Offside have crafted this piece about their favourite foreign language football phrases. Best by far is surely 'Der grösste Stinkstiefel' which translates as 'the biggest stinky boots' and is the award given to the worst player in the Budesliga each season.

3) With Chelsea apparently keen on buying Bayern Munich's Franck Ribery, perhaps the French star could be pulling this trick in Harrods next season. About one per cent of the effort that went into Rio Ferdinand's various merks and about 100 times funnier.

4) Continuing with the funnies, who put the Chuckle Brothers in charge of the stretchers? To me, to you, etc etc.

5) And we leave you with a genuine, 100 per cent, 24 carrot flash of skill from Zlatan Ibrahimovic. His assist for Pedro Rodriguez on Saturday is just delicious.