3PM odds and ends: Lookalike, Wicked Whispers, Daft Quotes and Chant Of The Week

By 3pm

Published 19:04 01/11/09

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MIRROR IMAGE

Was that hooded apparition in police images released this week a West Ham fan? Or someone far more cuddly - Death from Ingmar Bergman's 'The Seventh Seal'? (Thanks to Jerome Smail)

WICKED WHISPER 1

Which winger's wife hates his fans? Supporters are complaining she refuses to let her husband sign autographs or pose for pictures when they're out together - often becoming quite aggressive in pushing away even the youngest fans...

WICKED WHISPER 2

Which self-styled hardman has a spurned ex who can't wait to tell all about his habit of sobbing at the end of chick flicks?

WICKED WHISPER 3

Which Premier League star and dad of one has an injunction 'on permanent standby' in readiness for if/when his fling with a lapdancer is discovered?

DAFT QUOTES OF THE WEEK

"They wear their hearts on their shirts" - STEVE BULL

"In his youth, Michael Owen was literally a greyhound" - JAMIE REDKNAPP

"They're lacking that real streak of bang" - PAUL MERSON

CHANTS FOR PIES

Manchester United needed a decent chant to replace 'Viva Ronaldo' and they've found one in praise of an unlikely hero. To the tune of 'Bad, Bad Leroy Brown' it goes: "He's big, he's bad, he's Wesley Brown; The hardest man in all of town; Orange hair beware!; Come and have a go if you dare."

Luke B wins a tray of Pukka Pies for that. Now it's your turn to win. Email the funniest chant you've heard at football this week to steve.anglesey@mirror.co.uk together with your name, address and choice of potato & meat, chicken & mushroom, cheese & onion, steak & kidney or all-steak flavours.