Gould the assassinator, Groves hits the roofies and fans taunt Chiles

By 3pm

Published 22:57 07/11/10

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Clearly stung by being named only the 18th maddest person in football in my new book (available here , fans of quality literature), Talksport analyst Bobby Gould has taken things to a new level.

Among his work this week: a discussion of "what Liverpool need to put together in the January buying shop window" and praise for Kevin Davies, who "scored two and nearly got his hot track".

And, best of all, a word for Tottenham's Wilson Palacios: "He was Spurs' rack in midfield last season... they need that kind of assassinator now".

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Radio Five Live staff went on strike last Friday and no doubt wish analyst Perry Groves had done the same.

During a discussion of how Liverpool's ageing billionaire owner John W Henry had managed to pull his very attractive young wife, the former Gunner told Colin Murray: "My girlfriend hasn't gone with me for the fame or the money. It must be the Rohypnol I keep putting in her drinks. She doesn't know what day it is."

A shocked pause followed before Murray moved swiftly on...

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PIES FOR CHANTS

Southport may have lost their FA Cup tie to Sheffield Wednesday, but they won the chant war. As Adrian Chiles stood pitchside at Haig Avenue, he was hailed with a chorus of "There's only one Jason Manford".

Email the funniest chant you've heard at football this week to steve.anglesey@mirror.co.uk together with your name, address and choice of potato & meat, chicken balti, chicken & mushroom, cheese & onion, steak & kidney or all-steak flavours.

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Steve Anglesey's 3PM Annual: The Stupidest Football Book Ever is out now! Buy a discount copy at http://amzn.to/bJoj4O

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