If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

By David Anderson

Published 11:58 11/11/09

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We're all familiar with the Michelin guide when it comes to eating out.

So I thought it might be pointless fun to compile the MirrorFootball guide for eating at football grounds.

My most unscientific of research is based on the northern clubs I frequent and I've listed them in no particular order with a fork rating out of five.

Bolton: On entering the Reebok, one's eyes are immediately drawn to a huge silver bowl and an equally-huge ladle.

This contains the finest onion gravy in the north of England and its union with a Greenhalgh's meat pie and chips is a marriage made in culinary heaven.
Fork rating 4

Wigan: One positively salivated at the prospect of dining at the DW, given Wigan's peerless reputation when it comes to pies.

But having carefully checked the foil colour coding to avoid the dreaded cheese and onion pie, I must confess to being slightly disappointed when I took my first bite.

Still, the abundance of biscuits at half-time left one feeling content before indigestion set in.
Fork rating 3

Blackburn: Chez Ewood is one of the most improved havens for hungry reporters in the north.

The signature dish is a divine Lancashire hotpot, so authentic that if one listens carefully one can hear it say 'By heck, ecky thump! Turned out nice again!'.
Fork rating 3

Manchester City: Think of Manchester and one immediately thinks of contemporary architecture and cutting-edge design. This is reflected in the recently refurbished facilities at City, where one's taste buds are positively indulged by a superb carvery.

One is left feeling that one is at one's favourite aunt's with the copious amount of treats on offer and the piece de la resistance is the bespoke half-time meat pie, brought to one's seat in the press box.
Fork rating 5

Manchester United: Gone are the days when one used to fight one's colleagues for a Mr Kipling's French Fancy and a curled-up cheese sandwich.

Chips are very much the centre-piece, and at Old Trafford they are served with everything. Sir Alex also serves up a classic red whine every time United lose.
Fork rating 3

Liverpool: Few eateries are steeped in as much history as Anfield and one is left in awe at the thought that this was once part of the hallowed boot room.

Seating is sparse, and contrary to the chants of visiting fans, Rafa Benitez does not moonlight there as a fat Spanish waiter.
Fork rating 3

Everton: After climbing up three flights of stairs to reach Goodison's intimate eaterie, diners are prepared to eat anything.

Like the manager, the food is plain, but good, and should one have a sweet tooth, yes, there are toffees.
Fork rating 3

Hull: One might have thought that fish would be the dish, given Humberside's strong links with the sea.

But last Sunday manager Phil Brown served up humble pie to all those who turned up expecting him to get the pork chop.
Fork rating 3

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